I was at a mommy group today. During our group, the question "What has been one of the greatest dissapointments of your life?" was asked to all of the mommies at my table. Immediately, I thought of an audition that did not get me the part, one that I really wanted... Slowly it dawned on me, as the other mommies were chatting, that autism is no longer categorized as a dissapointment to me. Not that I don't have days when I really, really wish things were different, but God has so turned the situation around for me that I no longer see it as a negative. When I see my Scarlet engaging with life in her uninhibited, happy way (granted she did take a man out in Goodwill this week-He had a really great tummy, she couldn't help herself, but forgetting that one) I see such a gift. When I reflect on all the ways God has shown up in our situation, I feel so loved. When I think of all the ways Scarlet has taught me about what really matters, I feel so grateful. When I think of all the ways I have learned to trust... well, autism takes on a decidedly priveledged dress. I have prayed that God would take this ugliness that was thrown into our lives and turn it into something beautiful. I realized today, that he has answered this prayer. Only God could work this kind of alchemy.
"All things work together for good for those who love him and are called according to his purpose" Romans 8:28